Marijuana and sexuality

Timaree answers your questions about sex, love and relationships

Timaree headshot
Sex advice shouldn’t be syndicated. We wanted a local feel to ours so we’ve enlisted the sound advice of resident sex professor Timaree Schmit. Have a question about your love life that needs answers? Email her at asktimaree@philadelphiaweekly.com. | Image: Redlite photos

Kids these days have been having a lot less casual sex than their parents’ generation, according to surveys.

This was true even before the global pandemic. What’s to blame for the relative prudery? Researchers say there are a variety of factors, including: Less social pressure to pair up, financial realities that force them to live with their families, an increased interest in video games, and a decrease in the popularity of drinking. 

Alcohol consumption is the biggest predictor of engaging casual sex, especially for women, report researchers in a recent article in journal Socius, and today’s youth culture is engaging in a lot less binge drinking. 

Maybe this is where weed can step in to get us back to banging. While alcohol is far more likely to be associated with “heightened perceived sexual effects” than marijuana among partiers, studies on marijuana and sexual frequency show that regular users of the devil’s lettuce are having sex a lot more than people who don’t partake and that using weed before sex is associated with “increased sex drive, improved orgasm, and decreased pain.”

“I think it’s generally safer to combine [weed] with sex than alcohol, as it can lower inhibitions/get you out of your own head but doesn’t impair in the same way as alcohol. It does complicate consent,” says educator and performer Carmen Monoxide, who has worked with couples who wanted to integrate marijuana into their play. 

I’ve always been ‘headsy’ with grass of any sort, much prefer to talk or watch or read together. Then Ho Sai Gai.

“I get absolutely furious when I find out during or after sex or BDSM play that someone has gotten high and not disclosed it ahead of time,” she says. 

“You have to disclose being under the influence of anything when negotiating, or you don’t have informed consent!”

For those looking to dabble, she adds, “Smoking/vaping tends to dry out mucous membranes (like mouths and vaginas) more than edibles, but [it’s] easier to ‘dial in’ and quickly understand the effects, whereas edibles can be a bit more unpredictable for most folks.”  

As with anything related to drugs or sex, your mileage may vary. I put out a call for experiences with marijuana and sexuality and got back a big mix of responses. 

“Very intense orgasms, very sensitive genitals after. But also sometimes it makes me very uncomfortable to be touched, anywhere on my body. And when that happens I just want my own personal space.” – Nate

“Makes me hornier/allows me to last longer and perform better and does the exact opposite for my partner.” – Matt

“As a very, very, very tense person, cannabis definitely helps me during sex. It intensifies arousal for me, helps me loosen up. Not sure if it has any effect on climaxing because that’s always been difficult for me.” – Minh-Thu

“Weed generally doesn’t make me feel as sexually/sensually activated as other substances, but an edible did lead to me having sex with the moon once and telling a previously platonic friend how much I wanted to kiss them. That was one hell of an outlier.” – Maggie

“In every single time I have combined the two experiences, they have married together in the best possible ways. Either by myself or with a partner, the intensity of the sexual excitement and experience is rarely rivaled. The top three sexual experiences are all marijuana-infused and all parties involved had ingested some, so for me, it is a welcome addition.” – Shawn

“Two great tastes that taste great together!” – Kennedy

I think it’s generally safer to combine [weed] with sex than alcohol, as it can lower inhibitions/get you out of your own head but doesn’t impair in the same way as alcohol.

“Wonderfully enhancing. Intensifies everything in a good way.” – Greg

“I’ve always been ‘headsy’ with grass of any sort, much prefer to talk or watch or read together. Then Ho Sai Gai.” – Scott

“I just think sex is goofy when I’m high. And I have to pee a lot.” – Jake

“It makes sexual experiences a little more euphoric when you’re stoned! But even alone I find smoking weed and dancing or taking nude photos to be a wonderful combo. Loosens me up.” – A-Shanti

“For someone with PTSD, it helps me turn off the anxious part of my brain that is cluttered with all the bad memories. I can temporarily shut that overthinking behind a door in timeout so I can be more present in my body in that moment with my partner.” – Janet

“I’ll be honest, I can’t really enjoy myself during sex unless I’m high. I’m menopausal, so hormones are a little off. But I can’t ‘let go’ unless I take a hit first.” – Lori

“Weed allows me to focus on my body’s responses to stimulation in a way that is very hard to do when sober without extreme concentration. It is much easier for me to orgasm and have more orgasms when high. I also find pleasure in more types of sensations more easily when high. Weed plus a moderate amount of alcohol is even better, because alcohol helps the high from the weed last longer and feel more intense with less weed.” – Angel

“Weed rarely enhances sex for me. Either I’m already having too good of sex or I need to try a different strain.” – Marisa

“It’s always a great body high for me and I’m ultra relaxed but feeling EVERYTHING. Every single thing I do feels so important and that I want to cherish it for whatever it is. I feel extremely present when high which is super, super, super important to me, and I feel like I risked losing that when drinking or taking something else. I’ve been alcohol sober for over two years and I actually switched my use of alcohol for weed and weed does everything I wanted alcohol to do and more!” – Blair

“It literally resurrected my sex drive after not having one for eight years. Probably indirectly saved my marriage.” – Beth

“I’d much rather have sex on acid, alcohol, shrooms, benzos, uppers. The shrooms and acid could also lead to distractions, but they definitely have me feeling extra sexual when I use them. Especially the acid.” – Delta

“My other vices can totally enhance sexual experiences but nothing else relaxes it like that. The relationship between my mental health, body issues, comfort, and arousal is a PITA to navigate and weed is the only substance that makes me feel less spazzy about it all!” – Elsa

Have a question for Timaree? Send an email to asktimaree@philadelphiaweekly.com.


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  • Timaree Schmit Headshot

    Timaree Schmit is basically an episode of Adam Ruins Everything, but in the shape of a person. She has a PhD in Human Sexuality Education and years of experience in community organizing, performance art, and finding the extra weird pockets of Philly.

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