Calendar: Nov. 15-22



Eat | The Bourse Food Hall Grand Opening

The location of the nation’s oldest commodities exchange, The Bourse, has become the new home of fried and delicious in the old Philly neighborhood. Spanning all cuisines and all geographical flavors, The Bourse is actually already serving up the salty and the sweet thanks to their soft opening. But the big bonanza grand opening is coming this Thursday, and it’s sure to be tasty. | 9am. Free. The Bourse Philly. 111 S. Independence Hall E.

Social | College Night in Dilworth Park

We know what you’re thinking. College kids. A city park. The nighttimes when the sun falls asleep. You’re thinking, “they’re gonna have a big sleepover aren’t they? And we weren’t invited. How could they? How!?” Well, worry not my fine Philly friend. They’re not having a too-awesome-to-believe sleepover, though that’d be tight. They’re just enjoying cheap ice skating, which obviously isn’t as cool as a sleepover, but it’s pretty OK. | 9am. Free. The Bourse Philly. 111 S. Independence Hall East

Music | Malaa

Apparently, no one knows just who Malaa really is. He wears a balaclava sometimes, a straight-up ski mask at others. He loves cigarettes and creating dance beats. And he’s a he. That’s all the stuff we know about the man behind the “Notorious” hit. But he’s out on tour supporting his latest offering, including the single “Kurupt,” and you don’t need to see his face to dance up a storm while he melts yours. | 9pm. $18.70. Concourse. 1635 Market St.

Social | GreatPHL 2018

Kismet Cowork is working together with a whole host of Philly businesses to create an event the likes of which the city has never seen before – an event that’s all about ideas. OK, OK. Lots of Philly events have been about ideas and notions and even an inkling or three. But GreatPHL is all about Philly, about what’s good in the city, what’s bad, and what could stand to be changed completely. Plus, they’re looking to establish a group to help teach kids about healthy breakfast options. | 8am. Prices vary. Venice Island Performing Arts Recreation Center. 7 Lock St.

Social | Sasheer Zamata

Sasheer Zamata is a name known to a lot of people, thanks in large party to the comedienne’s time on the long-running NBC sketch show, “Saturday Night Live.” But Zamata is a lot more than just the three seasons she spent at 30 Rockefeller Center. The Indianapolis native has since done extensive work with the ACLU, pushing the fight for women’s rights forward. So go ahead and laugh – just don’t make the mistake of selling this celebrity ambassador (whatever the hell that is) short. | 8pm. Prices vary. Punchline Philly. 33 E. Laurel St.


Learn | Cults at the Convent

Atlas Obscura is an awesome website. If you’ve never checked it out before, maybe take a couple of minutes to peruse their weird repository of the obscure and, possibly, out-of-this-world. Now that that’s done, let’s talk about your Friday night plans. Why not ditch the couch and join Field Agent Ryan Susurrus of Atlas Obscura Society Philadelphia for a lecture on the history and types of cults and new religious movements in ancient and contemporary society? Seriously, what else is there to do? | 6pm. $25. The Convent Philly. 1648 E. Berks St.

Learn | CRISPR & The Future of Genome Editing

Maybe this is the better thing you should do? Listen, we don’t decide for you, we just lay out the options and let you choose what’s best. Maybe it’s creepy cults at the convent. Maybe it’s a lecture at the Science History Institute about CRISPR (Clustered Regularly Interspaced Short Palindromic Repeats, duh), biology and biotechnology, and the future of genome editing, given by renowned professor Jennifer A. Doudna. | 6pm. Free. The Science History Institute. 315 Chestnut St.

Music | Elephante

Even if we didn’t already know this is a DJ/dance show, you can always tell by the start time. If it’s dance and/or drug-related, it’s going to start in the double digits. 10pm. 11pm. Midnight or later (or is it earlier?). There’s something truly magical about delaying the inevitable for those few extra hours. Or, at least, we assume there must be. Why the hell else would DJs make everyone wait all day to hear them press play? | 10pm. Prices vary. NOTO Philly. 1209 Vine St.

Social | Beaujolais Bash

We’ll admit, as far as Philly Weekly goes, this event’s a bit on the pricey side. But, honestly, if you can’t treat yourself every once in a while, then what’s the point? We sure as shit don’t have 50 bucks to just spend all willy nilly, but what we do have is a deep-seeded love for all things booze. And Beaujolais, for those uneducated and likely sober amongst us, is a type of wine. Is it a good type of wine? That we can’t say. But it’s alcoholic. And there’s gonna be a lot of it. | 6pm. $55. Courtyard at Rittenhouse. 210 W. Rittenhouse.

Social | Fall Cigar Party

This is just our attempt to balance the universe. By which we, of course, mean that we offered you a hoity toity, fancy and expensive event last, so we’re doing deep into the dirty on this one (though it’s expensive too). Ladies and gentlemen (gentlemen more likely), welcome to Cheerleaders, the ultimate in sinful Philly celebration. Oh fine, it’s a strip club. But they have cocktails and, on this night, a three-hour open bar, a bound-to-be-delicious buffett, and a whole party dedicated to smokeables. Not the fun kind though. The kind your grandpa would chew on while calling you a sissy or a tomboy. | 6pm. $100. Cheerleaders Gentlemen’s Club. 2740 S. Front St.


Social | Bottomless Brunch

The fab foodies at Vesper Sporting Club have dubbed this a “brunch party like no other.” Which we take to mean, “exactly like every other brunch you’ve been to but here’s a sweet deal we tacked on to make it even more enticing.” That deal? $29 for all the mimosas you and your degenerate friends can pound in one short sitting. We’ll always tell you to drink responsibly, but we’re also well aware that that means very different things to different people. | 11am. $29. Vesper Sporting Club. 223 S. Sydenham St.

Music | Jamaaladeen Tacuma

PNC Arts Alive presents Jazz Cultural Voices, an initiative aimed at a belief in the Philadelphia Clef Club of Jazz & Performing Arts, and a commitment to providing the funding that makes events like this possible. Jamaaladeen Tacuma and his band, the Gnawa Soul Experience, combine ancient African Gnawa traditional instrumentation and musical themes with a unique sense of production in western genres like funk, jazz and groove. Put it all together and it makes for one hell of an auditory experience. | 730pm. $20. Philadelphia Clef Club of Jazz & Performing Arts. 738 S. Broad St.

Social | Wine, Dine and Create

Woof. We’re a little on the expensive side this week. Sorry about that, coupon-cutters and penny pinchers. We’re not doing it on purpose, we swear. It’s just that there’s all this awesome stuff and yeah, sometimes you gotta pay for something good. Like this Wine, Dine and Create event at Urban Art Gallery. Sure, it costs $50. But you get to eat food from some place called Bizzle Kitchen and drink drinks from some place called Cizzle Sips (wonder if they’re related?) and learn to paint with some wondrous being named Dwoods. If that’s not worth half a hundred, we don’t know what is. | 8pm. $50. Urban Art Gallery. 262 S. 52nd St.

Social | Who Do You Relish? Speed Dating

If we were asked to describe what our literal worst nightmare is, we’re not 100 percent on all the details, but we know it’d involved lots of other people and forced social interaction. So we don’t take supporting a speed dating event lightly. We know how hard it is out there, singles. Especially if you’re an introvert like, well, everyone here at Philly Weekly. But love it worth it. There’s no doubt. It takes time and effort and, let’s face it, a whole lot of pain. But when you find it, you’ll be glad you took the chance. | 6pm. Prices vary. Cavanaugh’s. 1823 Sansom St.

Learn | An Introduction to Umana

We get it. We hear it. The collective sound of all the alternative minds in Philly proper going, “What the hell is that?” all at once. Well, we’ll tell you what the hell that is. Umana, you see, is a Philadelphia nonprofit dedicated to promoting non-violence and mindfulness among kids, using programs to create artistic outlets and mindful practice for at-risk and incarcerated youth. If that sounds like a good thing – which it is – maybe come out and help them celebrate their grand opening. | 7pm. $10. The Broad on Mifflin. 1903 S. Broad St.


Music | Theory of the Yunivrs

No, we didn’t spell that wrong, through we appreciate you checking– jerk. Anyway. Yusri Yunivrs is, well, no one. Which is to say, you probably don’t know who he is. Because we don’t know who he is. But we’ll always support anyone bold enough to chase their dreams and, if you take a quick look around the Interwebs, it certainly seems that Yusri is determined to run down his dream of becoming a professional musician. So go out and support. Life is only lived once. | 7pm. Free. Funtimes Magazine. 1226 N. 52nd St. 

Social | The Belle of the Ball: Adult Prom

We went to our senior prom, though if we’d had our druthers, we probably wouldn’t have. Not that it wasn’t a good time or anything, though it was a little overcrowded and for some reason weird stuff kept magically appearing in the chocolate fountain. But we wouldn’t want to do it again. For a lot of reasons. But, our assumption is, that for all the same reasons we wouldn’t want to do prom all over again, a pretty good portion of you would be all too happy to tux it up all over again. | 6pm. Prices vary. Tysha White. Address provided post-registration.

Social | Sunday Tea: Philly’s Queer Day Party

What is it about tea that seems so soothing? It’s leaves soaked in warm, sometimes boiling, water – is it the temperature? Is it that you have to hold it between your hands like a candle and blow until the last wisps of vapor have been wiped away? We don’t know the answer. But we do know that Philly’s Queer Day Party might be comfortable – it’s a safe space, after all – but it’s anything but soothing. Which is to say, it’s a party. And even the Sunday Scaries can’t keep this shindig from showing out. | 5pm. $5. The Midtown. 114 S. 12th St.

Social | Industry Friendsgiving

There’s something so undeniably special about a holiday celebration amongst friends. Not that it’s any less special to share it with family, it’s just that with friends, you know deep down in your heart that you’re all choosing to spend time together. To celebrate with the people who are truly closest to you. And if you’ve ever worked in the service industry, you already know that there’s no one in your life you’ll ever get closer to than the person who busses your tables or the cook who stands next to you on the line. | 10pm. Free. Vesper Sporting Club. 1029 Germantown Ave.

Music | Tomberlin

Tomberlin is actually Sarah Beth Tomberlin, a Jacksonville native with a penchant for creating work seemingly well beyond her physical years. At 16, she’d already written the majority of her breakout album, At Weddings. The daughter of a Baptist preacher, Tomberlin went through quite the transitional phase following her homeschooling and Christian college. But we should all be thankful she did, because the music that came out on the other side is stark, stirring and real. | 7pm. $12. Johnny Brenda’s. 1201 N. Frankford Ave.


Social | Angry Rooster Grand Opening

We’ve never eaten at an Angry Rooster, but boy howdy do we love wings. We love them so much, we inadvertently fall back into some kind of strange cowboy patois every time we even so much as think about them. And while Angry Rooster already has a number of locations in the Philly area, we’re always support another purveyor of poultry. So head on out for some Monday night grub, including a free wing tasting. | 8pm. Free. Angry Rooster. 812 Chestnut St.

Music | Riz La Vie

Riz La Vie is a Malaysian singer whose claim to fame thus far is that he made it all the way to the finals of a Malaysian talent show called “Akademi Fantasia” (side note; indie band name, calling it now). And while coming in second on a reality show thanks in large part to N’Sync’s “It’s Gonna Be Me” is impressive, what’s really impressive is that the young singer from far away has managed to turn that short-lived shot at fame into, possibly, something a little more lasting. | 7pm. $12. Creep Records. 1050 N. Hancock St.

Learn | Capoeira Classes

Brazilian dance fighting sounds like an oxymoron. You can’t dance and fight and be Brazilian all at once, can you? Oh, but you can. Because capoeira, as Wikipedia explain, is “an Afro-Brazilian martial art that combines elements of dance, acrobatics, and music,” developed in Brazil in the early 16th century. So not only is it possible to be all three things, this crazy non-fighting fighting style has been around longer than The General Crisis (we suggest this as a new term for our current cultural, um, predicament). | 6pm. Free. 253 N. 3rd St.

Social | Museum District Scavenger Hunt

It’s time to tap your inner Nicolas Cage. No, not the fiery skull version or even the drunk in Vegas, Oscar-worthy version. No, we’re talkin’ the classic of classic – Benjamin Franklin Gates stealing the god damn Declaration of Independence. Only instead of stealing important cultural artifacts, you’ll be answering trivia questions (and also maybe stealing hearts). Each puzzle solved leads to the next one and, if you’re lucky, that long-held family secret you’ve been seeking a solution to since Grandpa Cage sat you down one childhood morning and said, “Nic, this is what life’s all about.” | 8am. $50. Puzzling Adventures. 1 S. Penn Sq.

Music | Radio 104.5 Miller Lite Mystery Show

We’re pretty sure there will actually be real, live musicians performing at this event. But it’s a Mystery Show, so we can’t give it our normal 100 Percent Unquestionable Awesome guarantee. Still, there’s plenty of reason to be excited for this indefinable event at Xfinity Live! For one, there’ll be football on. And for another, there’s a whole host of bands who potentially could be there too. Imagine Dragons. Muse. Mumford & Sons. And while that last one sucks and it’s entirely possible none of them show, at least you’ll know you made the most of your boring-ass Monday night. | 7pm. Prices vary. Xfinity Live!. 1100 Pattison Ave.


Learn | Anatomy Eats, Part Two

This series, from the Culinary Literacy Center at the Free Library of Philadelphia, is aimed at throwing open the doors on our digestive system. In fact, you’ll get the chance to actually taste the liver, stomach, intestine and tongue, as prepared by chef Ari Miller, while physician Jonathan Reisman describes how these components work together to keep our bodies healthy. Sounds fun, right? | 6pm. Prices vary. Free Library of Philadelphia. 1901 Vine St.

Learn | Dungeon Master School

We’ll be honest; we’ve promoted this event in the past. And we’re not promoting it again in an effort to show favoritism, but because we think the entire idea of a class aimed at teaching people to become Dungeon Masters so that they then can walk their friends through a mythical board game experience is just so freakin’ cool. It’s got everything we like; friendship, games, free-ness and the not-so-slight scent of body odor. | 7pm. Free. Thirsty Dice Board Game Cafe. 1642 Fairmount Ave.

Social | Festivus for the Rest of Us

The Cocktails and Conversations crew is set to celebrate one full year of bringing people together in the name of community and, well, conversation. Talking through shit. Figuring out how we, as humans, can help one another to be better humans. That kind of stuff. So far this year, Ashley Assists, the company behind Cocktails and Conversations, has helped raise money for six nonprofits across the city. Help make sure they can do the same next year. | 6pm. $20. Pyramid Club. 1735 Market St.

Learn | Building Coalitions

The midterms just passed and, well, it went OK. Not great. Not awful. Not nearly as well as it could have gone. But either way, it’s over now and time to look forward to the next challenge. But the truth is, most ordinary people can’t make a huge difference on their own. Together though, just about anything can be accomplished. Join Serve Philadelphia in discussing coalition creation, and the work that they can get done. | 5pm. Free. Philadelphia Municipal Services Building. 1401 John F. Kennedy Blvd.

Learn | Building Terrariums

We simply couldn’t say no to the near-perfect symmetry of pairing an event all about building consensus and like-minded, action-based coalitions with an event all about building … terrariums? Yeah, you got that right. Terrariums, bitch. Seriously though, terrariums are awesome. They’re basically tiny ecosystems that exist inside some kind of – usually – glass enclosure. The only trick? You’ve gotta bring your own. Booze, that is. | 730pm. $49. ILLExotics. 1724 E. Passyunk Ave.


Music | Lil Durk

Lil Durk, aka Durk Banks, is a Chicago-based rapper, singer and songwriter making waves with a whole new brand of mixtape madness. Fresh off dropping his “Neighborhood Hero” video and single, the Only the Family patriarch just announced the track listing for his first full-length album, Signed to the Streets 3, which features guest appearances from names like Kevin Gates, Young Dolph and Future. | 9pm. Prices vary. Vanity Grand Cabaret. 6130 Passyunk Ave.

Comedy | Joe Clair

Joe Clair, aka Joe Cleezy, of BET, First Amendment Stand Up and The Jamie Kennedy Experiment fame, is bringing his particular brand of belly laughs to Warmdaddy’s this wonderful Wednesday night. Alliteration aside (god, it’s like we can’t stop), Clair was the host of BET’s Rap City from ‘94 to ‘99 and currently hosts his own drive-time radio show in D.C. Is that enough information for you to go see the man do some stand up? | 830pm. $25. Warmdaddy’s. 1400 S. Christopher Columbus Blvd.

Learn | Mom-Mom’s Pierogi-al School

If the title confused you, you’re probably not alone. But the good thing is, that cryptic clause brought you here, and here is right where you want to be. Seriously. Join Mom-Mom at … Mom-Mom’s Kitchen … for night of perfectly folded Polish deliciousness. Just think about it – 35 measly bucks gets you homemade pierogies for the rest of your life! Screw it, we’re going too. | 630pm. $35. Mom-Mom’s Kitchen. 2551 Orthodox St.

Music | Max Seidman & Brown Sugar

We’re always gonna put Philly first. That’s just how we do things at Philly Weekly. It’s right there in the name, after all. As such, we’re all about promoting local. Like Max Seidman. Max is a Philly-born and -bred singer, songwriter and guitar player who did the smart thing and moved somewhere else to make it. Seriously though, we can’t hate on Max for moving to Nashville to grow his sound. It’s the place to be these days. But he’ll be back in town for at least one night, so go and say hello. | 8pm. $10. The Locks at Sona. 4417 Main St.

Music | The Dead South

In a twist of irony nearly as profound as the Spiderman pointing at himself meme, The Dead South are not, in fact, from the south. Turns out, this fivesome folk-bluegrass crew is from none other than Canada. Yep. That’s right. Canada! Our stoned brethren to the north. Those maple syrup licking, hockey hosers. But seriously though, Canada is wonderful and we should try to be more like them, including creating bands like The Dead South. | 7pm. $20. The Trocadero. 1003 Arch St.


Social | Thursday Morning Trek

For a lot of people, Thanksgiving isn’t a holiday about seeing friends and family, or even about giving thanks. It’s a holiday about food. And booze. And naps. And far be it for us to judge how anyone chooses to spend their holiday – we’ll be in Boca, don’t ask – there are plenty of options besides, “eat a lot and get drunk.” But, if you’ve got your heart set on that experience and you want to earn your way into that fourth slice of cheesecake, maybe go for a hike in the morning? Ya know, just to get the soon-to-be-coagulated blood flowing. | 715am. Free. Wissahickon Environmental Center. 300 W. Northwestern Ave.

Social | 6abc/Dunkin’ Thanksgiving Day Parade

America’s oldest Thanksgiving Day Parade (bet you’ve never heard that one before) returns for another year of gargantuan balloons, slow-moving mummers and all the restrained Christmas cheer of one entire East Coast city. The 1.4-mile route ends at the Philadelphia Museum of Art, and it’s probably the best place to settle in and watch. But the parade wanders all along the Ben Franklin, so really, the only bad seat is the one you missed out on. | 830am. Free. Philadelphia Museum of Art. 2600 Benjamin Franklin Pkwy.

Give Back | Thanksgiving at the Rock

Every year, Rock Ministries puts together a community-backed Thanksgiving meal for those in need. This year will be no different. And considering Thanksgiving is all about, well, giving thanks, showing appreciation, sharing what we can with those around us, it’s probably high time you headed on over to the Rock and registered for a day of giving thanks by giving back. | 11am. Free. Rock Ministries of Philadelphia. 2755 Kensington Ave.

Give Back | Arms of Alpha Thanksgiving Service Event

The good deeds don’t stop at one. And with so many Americans without basic necessities or access to quality food, there’s no reason it should. Arms of Alpha is Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity’s Day of Service (we know, we know, fraternities suck, but this is for a good cause so shut up for a minute, OK?), providing meals to the less fortunate, and collecting donations of clothes, toiletries and more. | 8am. Free. Columbia North YMCA. 1400 N. Broad St.

Give Back | Meals for the Homeless

One more for the good guys and gals looking to do good works on the holiday that’s all about giving … and doing good. This particular volunteer event, held at the Thomas Paine Plaza, is hosted by the African Daughters of Fine Lineage. Volunteers will have the opportunity to spend the day setting up and distributing more than 600 hot meals, and sorting and distributing donated items in care packages. There will also be plenty of opportunities for donations as well. | 11am. Free. Thomas Paine Plaza. 1401 John F. Kennedy Blvd.